Level of spirituality

In the Bahamas 

The general level of spirituality is higher in the Bahamas than in The United States of America. Many argue that the Bahamas and the United States are similar because they are both countries built on Christian values. Although both nations are founded on Christian faith, the Bahamas is undeniably the most spiritual of the two. The so called Christian nation is arguably charging down the road towards spiritual apathy similar to that which Americans experience which is evident in the alarming increase in violent crime rates. Furthermore, these rates seem equally proportional to the rates of hypocrisy. It would seem that the hypocritical, bible tooting and scripture quoting propensity of Bahamians far exceeds that of the Americans in general.  A comparison of the different aspects of society shows the level at which both society embrace this acclaimed faith. The Media and societal norms are two major vehicles through which society conveys its culture. It can be argued that this is because both mediums are a communicator or reflection of the interests of the majority in a democratic society. That is, the media and common laws are simply mirror images reflecting the society’s ideals, perceptions, attitudes, and concerns. However, unbeknownst to many , this mirror image can be staged to reflect the interest of those whose are far more important than the common folk. The media in the Bahamas is a main conveyer of “truth”, the voice of those who cannot be heard and the mouth piece of the mute. Many radio stations whether classified as Christian or not bear the message of hope. The non too subtle messages of  “right living” and the rules that are golden are easily slung after each sentence, the ritualistic tendencies of praying, playing Christian music and daily references from the “good book” are some of the ways the abrasive messages of hope are conveyed. Those who dare to reject these messages of hope are regarded with strong disapproval and deemed disobedient therefore unworthy of  acceptance into the fold that molds all into one caricature. In the fold it is commanded that you profess but confessing is not a must, but it is said anyway so it does not seem too far from the actual command in the “good book”. On the list of approval also known as “Once you don’t get catch” is sweethearting, adultery, bribery, gambling, money laundering, just about any behavior that lacks integrity but still maintains a noble front so “politicking” is not to be left out.  On the list of absolutely-not’s is homosexuality, atheism, movies portraying homosexuality (especially gays), rape and murder of family members; especially if it is the immediate family member is a really big deal, to the victims only of course particularly on “mind your own business Mondays” as a popular radio personality likes to say. Inclusive is any other major offense which would require that the public clamor for the life of the offender through capital punishment as prescribed by the “good book”.  

In The United states 

Similar to the Bahamas, the length of time since the United States gained its independence from Britain is inversely proportional to the general level of spirituality. The Americans have lost most remnants of the Christian principles on which the founding fathers initially established the nation on, or so it would seem. The liberality and tolerance of the American society is almost frightening as freedom of speech and self expression takes precedence over Godly commandments such as love thy neighbor as thy self. The idea of children learning to give reverence to The Creator seems to be so disturbing to some parents that many fought for this to be stopped in schools. The idea of empowerment of a particular race and “rising like the dust “was so important to many that they ignored major ethically issues with a candidate whom they choose to make president mainly because of the color of his skin. Seldom will a radio station share  random commentaries about God even Christian radio stations are more concerned with political correctness. 

When the ones that are closest, that I’ve known the longest, hurt me the most; I still wanna love them just like You love me. Even though I’m hurting. I want a heart that forgives. When the pain is so deep, it’s so hard to speak, about it to anyone. Just like Your Son, I give up my right to hold it against them with hatred inside. I want a heart that loves everybody….even my enemies. I wanna love like You, be like You, just like you did. ‘Cause the heart that forgives is the heart that will live totally free from the pain of the past. And the heart that lets go is the heart that will know so much freedom 

Sometimes when the Holy spirit speaks to me I think it’s me talking to my self…His voice is so similar to mine but dostinctive, small, firm tiny whisper that makes me blush from head to toe. Sometimes I wonder if I should be feeling like this if this is even real. 

I try to figure out why,

I try to imagine this actually being real life,

this strange nightmare,

I try to imagine it ending,

I try to imagine waking up,

I try to imagine you,

smiling again,

talking again,

opening your eyes,

being full of passion,

full of energy,

Full of plans for the future,

full of ambition and zeal,

full of advise and corrections.

I try to imagine you being there for my graduation,

being proud of me and saying congratulations,

I try to imagine you walking me down the isle,

Being happy for me,

I try to imagine you spending time with your grandchildren,

spoiling them, and me complaining about it,

I try to imagine you taking vacations and actually being happy and having no worries

I try to imagine you being there for my baby sister,

to steer her in the right way so that i don’t have to worry about her,

I try to Imagine you not trying so hard to make sure we are ok,

But then i realized,

I don’t have to know why,

This IS real and I am never going to wake up,

You are smiling and laughing and your eyes are wide open

your energy, passion, zeal, ambition,plans, advice and corrections

passed along to those you left behind,

I realized,

you will be there and will be proud of me because you always are

You will be happy for me when i do good because you always are

You ARE happy because you have no more worries and are not struggling anymore.

You ARE there for my sisters because we will never forget you and everything you stand for

A provider, an educator, a warrior, a fighter.

I realized this and I am not so sad because your in a much better place. 

R.I.P AARON MADUAKONAM IKUNNE MADUEKE. November 20 1951-May 29 2011. I can never forget you dad not even if i tried :(

        Lord as I take this journey into yet another year. A year that promises completion, a year that promises to be the last among many spent in nursing school. I don’t even know what to say how to start all I know is I gatta go HARD because its all or nothing and I can’t afford the nothing. Right now I’m feeling like this is a cycle that I repeat every school year or even every year. I ask for your guidance and grace but I ignore you the remainder of the time as if to say you don’t deserve my constant attention and constant invitation. Lord, you and I know I have a problem with not only commitment but consistency. I don’t want this year to be like the last or the one before last.  I lived as those who don’t know you and that was my main sin, because to whom much is given, much is required and I was given a whole heap of knowledge that I was required to apply most of which I tossed to the side. I lived as if my life had no purpose other than to satisfy my selfish desires with temporary gratifications. Lord I don’t want to go through that self inflicted exile from you again! It was horrible. I miss your presence that filled me with peace. I miss your Holy Spirit’s constant guidance. Actually the Holy Spirit was and still with me, I could hear His small still voice every now and then I just choose to ignore, to not listen because I felt like my desires were more important and fulfilling them no matter how little or short termed was paramount. 

I call it filling in the blanks

We play it all the time 

We see a dirty homeless person on the streets…we fill in the blanks. 

We met someone for the first time…we fill in the blanks. 

We fill in the blanks we fill in the blanks we fill in the blanks.

We are given the opportunity to develop an intimate relationship with the creator of the entire universe but you know what we do instead….we fill in the blanks!

We see a young muslim women with her face covered

And we fill in the blank

We see someone who seems to think differently from us and we fill in the blanks.

Someone doesnt do something like we would and we fill in the blasted blanks.

Tired of having my blanks filled by you. Why wont you let me do it instead. 

      I can find a whole lot of reasons to write that are theologically correct but none of them will remove that stab of fear that I still feel whenever I think of dying. I think the part that makes me the most sad is dying young. Before I get to complete all of my milestones. But I don’t think my fear is different from that of the old person who has lived. The problem I believe is my lust for life, my passionate desire to live life to the fullest and the fact that I feel as though I haven’t. And for the old man it is because he had lived and wants to live some more. To do things different or exactly as he had done them. Fear of the unknown is probably what it boils down to. Not knowing what comes after death and life without our loved ones that make us happy is just unfathomable and way beyond what the human mind can imagine. And that scares me. We tend to feel sorry for the dead but truly we should envy them. They do not have to endure the imperfections of life anymore. Specifically i refer to the dead in Christ. Those who believed that Jesus is the Son of God and died to save Us. To be absent in the body is present with the lord. Do you know what that means? Physical death, which to us is the ending of life as we know it, is the beginning of something beautiful. Something the soul has longed for ever since Adam and Eve were banished from the Garden of Eden. Communion with God. Intimacy with God. The soul finally reconnected to its power source. So what exactly about this am i afraid of? My family, friends can not compare to the joy my soul will feel when i finally meet my King, my creator, the sovereign God who formed me in my mother’s womb…who loves me more than ANYONE could ever love me…pass my fears and doubt. 

1. KATNISS

[X] You would do anything to protect your family.

[] You have good aim.

[] You hate cats

[] You like to wear your hair in a braid.

[] You find sticking to instructions tough.

[x] You aren’t too fond of people in general.

[X] You hate being indebted to people.

[] You hold grudges.

[] You wouldn’t describe yourself as a warm, friendly person—you’ve got about as much charm as a dead slug

[] When you sing, the birds fall silent.

Total: 3

2. PEETA

[] You’re an artist.

[] You love to bake.

[] You can decorate well.

[] Manipulating people comes naturally for you.

[] You’re clever.

[] Your favorite color is orange.

[x] People tend to be charmed by you.

[] You’re a fantastic liar.

[] You’re a hopeless romantic.

[] You have a strong sense of self.

Total: 1

3. GALE

[x] You question everything.

[x] You’re very defiant.

[x] You’re spontaneous

[] You’re a rebel with a cause.

[] You would do absolutely anything for justice.

[x] People would describe you as being good-looking. 

[x] You’re very intelligent

[x] If your friend was in trouble, you’d do anything to try and help them.

[] You hate your Government

Total: 6

4. FINNICK

[x] You like sugar cubes.

[x] Others often describe you as sexy or gorgeous. 

[x] You’ve been used for your looks.

[] You’re a skilled swimmer.

[] When you’re anxious, your hands have to be occupied—with knots or something of that nature.

[x] You’re very popular, but don’t want to be.

[] You’re protective.

[] When the person you love isn’t with you, you feel lost and lonely.

[x] There’s more to you than what people see.

[x] You hate it when people judge you or others before getting to know them.

Total: 6

5. PRIM

[] You’re innocent

[] You have blonde hair.

[] You adore animals.

[x] You love helping people in need.

[x] People seem to be fond of you.

[] Over time you’ve become quite wise.

[x] You are nurturing.

[x] When you’re older, you want to be a doctor or a nurse.

[] You have an older brother or sister who would do anything for you

[] You are very forgiving.

Total: 4

6. CINNA

[] You’re creative.

[x] You root for the underdog.

[] You dress simply

[] You stand up for your cause

[x] Your hair is simple and easily manageable.

[] You tend to have brilliant ideas.

[] You would be willing to die for a cause

[] You are brave.

[] Your ideas are very ‘out there’ and they stand out from the rest.

[x] You aren’t like anybody you live with

Total: 3

7. EFFIE

[x] You’re somewhat materialistic.

[x] You’ve dyed your hair a wild color.

[x] You’re somewhat naive.

[] You’re chirpy

[] You’re punctual and hate lateness.

[] Etiquette is important to you.

[] You’re rich

[] You can be considered an airhead

[] While you may seem shallow, you have hidden depths

[] You hate where you work

Total: 3

8. HAYMITCH

[x] You’re very sarcastic.

[] You get drunk often.

[x] People might find you condescending

[] Outsmarting others is a talent of yours.

[x] You’re very lonely.

[x] You’re very intelligent.

[x] You tell it like it is.

[x] You’re dependent on something/someone.

[] You’re grumpy.

[] You’re cunning

Total: 6

9. JOHANNA

[] You’re a bold, gutsy person.

[] People might call you crazy

[x] You want things to be fair.

[x] You’ve had a rough time in life.

[x] You really don’t like most people.

[x] You have short hair

[x] You don’t like being in water.

[x] You’re defiant.

[x] You’re lonely.

[x] You have bad memories which you can’t seem to let go of

Total: 8

10. RUE

[x] You love music.

[] You’re small and graceful.

[] You hum often.

[x] You inspire others

[x] You’re always hungry.

[x] People underestimate you.

[] You’re innocent.

[] You’re smarter than you look.

[x] You’re an underdog.

[] You’re a good singer  

Total: 5